Book Review: Do Hard Things

I tend to have high standards and high expectations – both for myself and for those around me.  And, I have been told that my standards are too high, and my expectations are unreasonable.  Maybe they are.  Or, maybe society’s expectations are too low…

When I first heard about Alex and Brett Harris’ book Do Hard Things, I was intrigued.  But, I put off reading it because I assumed that it did not apply to me.  I am no longer a teenager, and we are still a good 10 years away from parenting one.  But, on Kelly’s recommendation, I moved it to the top of my “to-be-read” list.  (And, soon after that, my sweet husband searched every bookstore in town, and surprised me with a copy “just because.”)

Throughout the book, I was surprised at the insight and wisdom that these two authors had.  And, I had to keep reminding myself that they were “just teenagers.”  Just teenagers?  Even as I thought it, I realized that I had just proved their point.  I did not expect two teenage boys to be capable of writing a book – let alone a good one!  (It should not be surprising though.  The Lord has truly blessed their family with an exeptional gift in this area!  They are the sons of Greg and Sono Harris, and the younger brothers of pastor and author Josh Harris.)  While I do not know them personally, in their writing they certainly exemplify 1 Timothy 4:12, “Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity.”

Do Hard Things calls teenagers to rethink how they are using this stage of their life – their time, talents, strengths – and challenges them to “this better way – a way to reach higher, dream bigger, grow stronger, love and honor God, live with more joy – and quit wasting their lives.” (pg. 8 )  While this book is aimed at teens, its message of doing hard things, and rebelling against low expectations is certainly applicable for adults as well.  “The truth is that all of us are susceptible to low expectations.  Once we have satisfied the minimum requirements, we tend to stop pushing ourselves.” (pg. 39)

The authors offer five types of hard things, “God-given opportunities powered by God-given principles that work for everybody” (pg. 57), and examples of teens around the world who have taken up this challenge:

1. Things that are outside your comfort zone – anything that takes you outside the rut of your normal day-to-day, week-to-week activities (pg. 57)
2. Things that go beyond what is expected or required – you aren’t content to “do not harm” – you purpose to do good. (pg. 58)
3. Things that are too big to accomplish alone – the ability to share a passion with others and recruit them to work alongside you. (pg. 58)
4. Things that don’t earn an immediate payoff – “…you won’t see much progress from one day to the next and because, especially at the time, it can seem like you’d be happier if you didn’t to them….We do them because they’re right, not because they have an immediate payoff.” (pg. 59)
5. Things that challenge the cultural norm – “We have to care more about pleasing God than we do about pleasing those around us.” (pg. 59)

While it is good, and necessary, to do big hard things for God, the responsibilities and requirements of certain stages of life will limit what we can do.  In chapter 8 the authors address the issue of Small Hard Things by asking the question:

“How do we reconcile the fact that there’s a big world out there to impact for God with the fact that we’re stuck at home matching socks in yet another load of laundry?” (pg. 132)

As I said before, amazing insight for two teenage guys!  A a stay-at-home wife, and mommy of a young child, this chapter, and that question in particular, resonated with me, probably more than any other.  There are many things that I would love to be able do in the realms of ministry and education…things that can seem much more exciting, or would possibly allow me to have a greater impact on the church than scrubbing toilets and coloring pictures. 

“Small things most often occur behind the closed doors of our homes, schools, or churches.  They are rarely new or exiting, and they are often repetitive – even tedious.  Small things happen on the level at which we normally live our lives.  In fact, in the most basic sense they are our lives – the “stuff” that makes up everyday living.” (pg. 135)

Right now, it is the small things, the stuff of everyday living that God has called me to.  He has called me to model this concept of doing hard things for my daughter, even if, at times, they  may seem somewhat tedious or insignificant.  They are not.  These are the things that God has given me to do.  And, He has called me to do them for His glory (Col. 3:23, 1 Cor. 10:31).

Regardless of our age, stage of life, talents, fears, past successes or failures, that is what He has called all of us to do.  This book would be a valuable resource for anyone who works with teens on a regular basis (parents, youth pastors/wives, teachers).  But, I also think that it is a must-read for all Christians.  Teenagers are not the only ones who fall prey to low standards and expectations.  We all need to set the bar higher, and this book, written by two teenagers, will encourage you to do so.